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Well, all the dentists in the USA call themselves "Doctor", and that's fair enough. Their qualification is DDS, Doctor of Dental Surgery. But can anyone afford to go to an American dentist? Take one poor boat owner from Seattle. Here is his boat:

And here are his teeth:

How can this be in the land of the free? Do they not have Pepsodent? But just a minute. I see Mr Allen hoists the Union Jack on his motor boat. Perhaps he attends an NHS dentist. Or, more likely, maybe he can't find one. I shall ask my American dental colleague to investigate. [