Oh, dear Lord!

These will be the death of me. Just when I think I can safely choke down the low fat ice cream bars, I am slapped in the face with these.

Oh, well I can't come home with ice cream for myself and none for The Boy, right?

They are too for The Boy!

Well, of course, being a good parent means tasting their food. You know, just to make sure it is safe.

Safe, ya, that's it I want to make sure it is safe. [chomp]

These things are addictive.[chomp] Little bite sized pieces of chocolate ice cream wrapped in a [chomp] crunchy chocolaty coating. ADDICTIVE I TELL YA![chomp chomp]

I cannot in good conscience subject The Boy to this addiction. He could turn into a couch potato, balloon to 400 pounds, sink into depression, write a manifesto and blow something up. I cannot and will not subject my child to that disastrous future. It just wouldn't be right, right?

[chomp] Don't give me that look. [chomp chomp] I am saving my son, God damn you!

Oh, bite me!